International News, Britney Does A Sinéad

Yes, Englanders. Britney Spears has shaved her head. It was the moment I've been awaiting after four years in America. Not that I've been petitioning the White House, or her fan club. Only that American Culture was awaiting its first meltdown before rising from the ashes Phoenix-like, or however long it takes Britney to grow her hair up. Clearly there are more important questions, o transatlantic friends. But I'm struck by a random memory that if Sinéad O'Connor - according to nothing more glamorous than a rumor lounging in my own dubious skull - hadn't shaved her head in the mid-80s she "could have been bigger than Madonna." Now let's not be grumpy in our clearly holier than thou envious way, Britain: Madonna is big, and she's American so more free-spirited (well, aristocratic Cockney). God I'm confused. But Sinéad's moment wasn't just a snip, as it were: she's made a career of weird (and wonderful). Britney however, might go Vanity Fair for her third celebrity baby with a thin veneer of brunette (on her head) to match her latest production, no? We'll have to see. And I'm not saying she's pregnant, just a bit bald. Discuss. And this won't be on the test.